I’ve started reading a book, thanks to my wonderful boyfriend.  It starts off by telling you that in order to obtain the greatness of God’s plans for you, you need to think big.  You can’t have negative thought patterns and still fulfill your dreams.  I don’t dream.  I’m afraid to.  What if it doesn’t come true?  Even worse, what if it does and its all wrong?  I’ve had both happen.  I didn’t graduate from college and I was engaged to a scumbag.  Could I actually get a degree?  Could I actually find a job that I like?  Could I possibly get out of debt?  Those dreams seem too big and scarey to me.  Tom says they’re not out of reach.  That they could come true.  I don’t know what to believe.  Do dreams really come true for failures like me?  Do I deserve to have my dreams come true?  How big can I think?  How big can I dream?  Can God really have all that in store for me?  I really don’t know.  It just seems to be impossible to me. *sigh*